Number 1- Life in a nutshell(Cow#1)

I was once standing on the beach
Help was ever so out of reach
I fell in the lake on my forhead was a leach
I got hungry and had a grape.

I was swinging from the trees;
When I fell and broke my knees
I fixed my torn sleeve with tape
I am insane and jump around with a cape
No I forgot i am really Peter Pan
Or maybe Superman

I built my home in a cave
I got hit on the head
I rembember my name is Dave
Yesterday I gathered these three leave plants for my bed

I now have poison Ivy and itch
Their's pirana in the lake
And fishning is a cinch
Every night I have fried snake

Yesterday cows attacked me
At the time I was drinking tea
They trampled my garden and smashed my boat
I caught one and made myself a coat

Now I have spent fifty years here on this island
Then one day I found out I was in Tailand
No really, on the other side of the island was an airport
It even had it's own seaport.

My life is wasted It has been tasted
And it is bitter
And full of dirt and litter

Number 2

Nature's Charm

I stood in the midst of a farm
It was old, dark and held no charm
The animals were sick and dieing

I had to call the vet
She came quickly and at the door we met
She was about seventy and had grey hair
Her head was in the shape of a big green pare.

First we went to look at the cows
And then we went and gasped at the sows
All of them were thin and weak
When she left she kissed me on the cheek

The cows and sows; I still wonder
But enough about them I hear thunder
I had better head inside the old house
Ot oh the door is locked and -oh there's a mouse

I know i can get in through the celler door
Then out of the corner of my eye I saw a boar
OOww- I feel pain, Aaahhh-it has begun to rain